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They are as follows: In my experience, this internalized belief is the poison that prevents some gay men from building a healthy relationship, and also why many mess up the ones they already have. Few of us grow up unscathed by family, peers, and a society hostile to our attractions and behaviors.

Some of us have been bullied as children; physically, verbally, and emotionally abused at tender ages by our peers and family members for being gay before we even recognized and understood our same-sex attractions.

Eric Russell does not work for, consult, own shares in or receive funding from any company or organisation that would benefit from this article, and has disclosed no relevant affiliations beyond the academic appointment above.

As a researcher in social psychology, I’ve often wondered: why During the course of my research, I’ve discovered that the most interesting, compelling – and, arguably, most theoretically coherent – explanation is through the lens of evolution.You keep coming up empty-handed, stymied in your efforts, no matter what you try.All of this talk of legalized marriage just seems to make things worse, adding pressure from friends, family, and even yourself.'And anybody that doesn’t live in that structure needs to find a home of sorts.'And I think labels are really important for kids, especially, [who] can’t find their tribe where they are, and need to go find their people, their family.

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